hello

I love Christmas. I kind of hate my family around this time, though. 

I wish I didn't feel so ... adopted. Having my cousins and everyone from up north just makes it worse.

My Aunt Lisa is adopted. She seems to hold it together really well. I wish we were closer. 

I miss the fuck out of my grandmother too. I made rice krispies for Thanksgiving. I tried to make them like she used to. They didn't turn out quite the same but ... it was an acceptable substitute.

I wish Ben didn't like his job so much, so we could move somewhere else. Colorado. Oregon. Washington.

Nah, that wouldn't work though. I'd start missing California after, like, a week and want to move back.

Maybe I'll just try Northern California for awhile and see how I can handle that.

Anyway! Here is a blurry picture of Ben and me at his company Christmas party. :)

Hooray!

Also ... I might be going back to the hospital tonight after work. I am not winning this war against pouchitis and dehydration and general bullshit my body is still trying to pull. We just can't get along!